August 1, 2006

• Well, I decided to come back on to xanga and say.. "forget myspace" HAHAHAH... I`m not a follower xp I`m just too cool O_o hahhaha.. Uhh no. -_- Well, summer has been alright. I stayed at Tiffany's house for a month or so, and my parents are finally back home. In a way I`m really happy, but in a way I`m kinda going to miss having them there. When I was over there I didn`t have to think much like when Elgin didn`t call. If something upset me I was able to talk to someone. Yea I could just call right? It`s not the same though. It feels so much lonely-er in my house. It`s like a place where I think, and trust me that`s something I shouldn`t be doing. Well, my first night back at home wasn`t the best night either.

  
  

  Schools almost started, and I`m not excited at all. I`m bored to death at home, but this year feels like it`ll be extremely different. All my friends tell me I shouldn`t think into the future only in the present, but I can`t help this feeling I`m having. Maybe things with Elgin and I won`t go so great afterall. I mean I want it too, but I feel this year he`ll ignore me more. This month with him has been great. It made me happy to know that things got better all because I didn`t go to Asia and try to run away from my problems like I`ve planned. We did a lot of things together this month, and I didn`t even expect to see him that much. I just hoped for it, and thanks to Michael that big head and Tiffany my lovely cousin for helping me. Even though I feel Elgin won`t treat me the best as he did during freshman year I still want to make his senior year the best and if I`m not able to be apart of that but he`s happier then I won`t want to be there. I just want his last year to be great. I feel stupid though like I alawys put him before almost everything even myself.

  
  

  I think that he changed from before all because of me. I really do want to trust him even if he doesn`t believe I want to. I understand more of how he`s feeling now. I just need to learn how to deal with it because I really do love him and I want things to work out badly. I got a new look too. I`m very excited about it and I didn`t want anyone to see it until school started. I can`t help it though!!! HAHAHAHAH. It`s sooo pretty. Thanks to Cindy Chau. HAHAH yea. The person that did my hair. xp I`m sure that I`m missing many of my own thoughts, but it`s okay. ;]

  
  

  BEFORE..
  
  
  and.. AFTER
  
  
  
  
  

  ++____//EDiT++
  More pictures. ;]
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  • 1:13 pm
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